Doesn't understand?

Why in god's name some guys are so fucken stupid and girls are so fucken dumb?
Ok, look i get it iv done some shit in my past and that i have actually learnt from it. bt why oh why do i still need to go thru all these stupid games?
why do i need to go thru games for? iv been done goin thru somethng MASSIVE and now im still being put to the test.
i dont want this
i want to kno why guys are SO FUCKED?

like.
for instance.
i started talking to this guy
2 hour convos every night
saw him
but the dickhead had a stupidness to him. wen he was talkin to me alone with me alone HE WAS NORMAL until he comes near his friends and WOOOP ! his a hard cunt needing to b the biggest cunt out.
and im not one to use the c word and here i am using it because this CUNT is so fkn dumb.

gah why do u guys do that?
why cant u jst b normal?
this world is NORMAL?
why do u need to change who u are becoz u think u need to b big?
who the fuck is going to love you as a big fukn dumb cunt! ?

ARRRGGHHH!!

WORST FUKN PEOPLE !!

The Best Kept Secrets ,

The only time i open myslf i seem to get fucked over. so you know what im not going to open up to NO BODY ! fk that! no more.
ima hold it down myslf. ima keep it to myslf. fk u and ur cute face and voice. aint nothing gna make me weak at the knees no more.

with everyword that u sayyyyy
is all but empty promisesss
beginnning to take its toll

Just Random Thoughts

to trust is to capture, to love is to hold, to believe, to be faithful, to be aware to be proud,to be enlightened by one's movement, by a word, by an emotion, by a feeling, by a touch - understand is to learn, knowledge is to grow.

the world is a big canvas. its ready for you to start your work of art. its ready for u to embrace. to hold. to learn. to trust. to understand. to imagine. to grow and definatly to grasp the cultures. the food and the people.

i am def. mumbling now its WAYYYY past my bed time

It's been a minute ..

yo, i know i havnt written on this in a while. and i think its high time that i should.
wow. so much has been going on in my life. new people. new friends. but i think im really missing the point of things. i mean. i really need to focus on my life but i really cant focus on them if i havnt got my priorities straight. i really need to be able to work something out but everytime i get my feet back on the ground some fool seems to mess with my head. everytime i think i have a system in my life. an order everytime i close my eyes something bad always happens. why is that?
why is it that every time something good happens that first sign you get it gets bad? or is that only me?

iv been through alot in my life. im 21 and iv gone thru so much drama that i just want it to be over. i want my course to finish. i dont want my bestfriends hating eachother.
im sick of trying to be the good person all the time. why cant people start treating me with the same respect i treat them?
like seriously?

im venting out on this which is possibly a good thing. a bad thing however is iy being 1 am and me having an interview and work in about 7hours .. goodnight and i shall b back! <3

New Year New Start ☮

Things always happen for a reason, i guess you could say that what ever happens was meant to happen.
the path you take is the path you choose no one has forced you to take that path but yet you follow what either your heart or head tells you.

the year 2009 was a year filled with hurt, betrayal, lessons and family loyalty. i must say for me it was the worst year of my life, but NO regrets. only lessons learned.
iv given myslf alot of guidelines to follow a lot of rules. plain simple rules.

1. family comes first
2. work
3. education

-the reason why education is 3rd is becoz my job now is what i wanna continue doing. i love the notion of being part of someone elses happiness and that means my designs for their wedding invites or birthday invites are seen by their favourite people =] love it

as for romance, what ever happens happens. im goin with the flow. im not goin to think. im not goin to RUSH into anything. im goin to try and love myslf first and then hopefully allah will have a plan for me. if not, im jst takin eachday that comes and hoping for the best.

030110